And old teacher taught me something valuable.
He said,
“Human beings are going to get into trouble with each other.
But what matters is HOW human beings get out of trouble with each other too.”
This is the value of a relationship, of the journey of tending to the disconnection places..so we can have more connection…which very often leads to hot sex, more love.. and greater intimacy..
- the things you secretly you crave
- and admit to each other in the quiet night hours that you know you need
- that is NON negotiable to do without anymore.
So when you get into trouble.. into mess, because you will…
Ask these two questions about it.
First, identify what mess it is.
Give it a name.
And then,
Ask the mess.
- What are you trying to tell us?
- What are you trying to birth through us?
Give space.
Listen.
Mind the defensive guards on top of your greater truth.
Breathe.
And receive the illumination you need.
There is always an answer inside of you.
Always.
For example, my client Kay would find herself feeling very painfully disconnected from her partner.
And the next time the intolerable pain arose they sat together…and asked the disconnection what it was REALLY trying to tell them, and what it was TRYING to get happening for them instead.
Notice the difference between happening ‘to’ them versus ‘for’ them. Empowerment versus feeling victimized is key.
Honestly, asking the questions was everything. It OPENED the channels.
And for Kay, she saw that the disconnection was asking for simple presence without reacting.
And it made her start showing up differently in every fight and completely turned the relationship around.
How many of us would benefit from this very simple shift?
Apply what you find.
Diffuse the rat’s nest of disconnection.
Get close.
Get intimate.
Get more in love.
Get more sex.
You in?
Tell me, the MOST important thing you can do right now to help birth the medicine in your mess? What attitude could you have? What shift could you make?.
