Category: Hot Sex

You’re in bed with your beloved.

You’ve been feeling connected.

Things are getting juicy.

Exciting.

Sensual.

Hot.

But there’s a little something that grabs you and pulls you out of connection.

It looks like a dissatisfaction.

Perhaps annoyance.

A complaint.

And the sex and lovemaking that you so deeply desire and crave suffers.

And so does the love and emotional connection.

Like what happened to my clients Jane and Jim.

They really loved each other.

But they didn’t know how to navigate.

And so they’d say things we are all capable of saying.

Things like, “I wished you’d touch me differently…( or) you need to be more loving and not do that…”

She’d be hurt..upset…feel rejected.

And he’d withdraw.

And they’d try to talk through it… but they couldn’t get past feeling so activated.

And from years of experience of dealing with trauma, I know activation and triggering are located deep in the body and cannot be resolved in the mind, although many try and end up feeling frustrated.

I won’t let my couples do the same thing with me that’s not working at home.

So I invited each of them to begin with simple grounding into the root of their bodies.

Orienting into the earth grounds is enough to get out of our head. And not only that, if we are dealing with sexuality, we are dealing with our root chakra, so we need to learn how to drop down there, and find alrightness in ourselves without the mind fixating on the problem.

And from there, it was effortless…because space opened…

And in that space, I invited them to sit next to each other.

Gently touching arms and legs together. And to gently feel both support and resistance from each other.

This helps neutralize negative mental charge.. and also gives the body a huge transmission that in conscious contact both support and resistance can help neutralize the situation, which it did.

And from neutrality…
Where space got freed up…
And healthy contact and resistance happening..

The real conversation could open..and a real connection about desires and requests were made, exchanges happening freely.

And this allowed, over time, the healing to happen.

And their sexual connection to be creatively restored from an empowered, but more importantly embodied place for both of them.

They reported feeling satisfied, were having way more frequent and juicy lovemaking, this now felt hotter, and they were definitely more in love than ever. Their eyes say it all.

It can do this for you too.

If you’re willing to go deeper, to your roots like this.. and hang out long enough to get what the edges need to soften, deepen and open.

If you’re ready for that, share with me ONE thing you can do this week to start to soften at the edgy places when it comes to sexual connection not going ideally. For me, I really enjoy slowing my breath waaaaay down to help my nervous system relax and clear away all activation.

I’d love to hear what you’re sending would really help you.

And… I’ve got ONE spot open this week for anyone who is wanting to turn up the hotness, love and intimacy in their love relationship…..even if you haven’t been having it for a while… get on this while there’s openings.. you can tell me any one thing you want help within your relationship.. and I’ll share with you the MOST EFFECTIVE thing that will totally help you.

When the sex isn’t flowing the way you feel it should, and it’s on the brink of creating some activation and reaction in your relationship with your sweetheart…and it’s creating intensity, loss of connection, frustration or activating limitations and trauma, and you could roll over and go to sleep…again.

And it’s playing out with good lovemaking and sex intentions gone wrong, and hot desires unfulfilled,

Stop and sense the discomfort and face it with breath, openness and curiosity! And slow waaaaaay down!

This has been my work in my relationship many times!

Contrary to popular internet posts and pictures, that would make you believe everyone is born a great lover, it takes time and practice to learn to be good and then great lovers.

It takes learning to hang out on the edges of vulnerability, of noticing when things are going down a dissatisfying path, and deciding that are you going to undefendedly, drop your usual armour and mind chatter, and simply turn to face what is there and see what it is asking for.

And it takes deep presence, right there, before the usual reactions step right in and sabotage a fabulous learning opportunity to go deeper into the thing that’s hard, that you can resist, but that also has the greatest pocket of energy tucked right into that resistance if you embody these qualities so you can have it.

You could get annoyed, irritated, and blame or shut down. You could think someone else could do love and sex with you better. You can find fault with yourself. But it’s urgent that you don’t do that anymore. And instead, you can slow down and find your root and the spaciousness inside your own body by sensing yourself; bottom, top, right, left, front, back and inside. And feel the pulse of presence bringing you back to yourself.

Those defensive ways of handling sex and lovemaking won’t lead to hot sex – they didn’t for me, nor did they help any of my clients ever get to the root of what was going on. They belong where they came from, conditioning, the culture you were taught about sex from, and the ignorance about how to do these deep intimate dances from society, but they are not who you truly are in this place. They never were.

Take the urge to react and blame, to criticize or find fault with and find the sense of that in your body. Identify the location. Feel the sense of it.. and just begin to let that place in your body be breathed by you. Let the exhale out. Ask in the space that’s opening up what’s truly needed for the new way out of this to be clear. And hold yourself to the truth of what that is until the old dance is met with new steps.

I’ve had to do this many many times.

From dissatisfaction to curiosity. From disappointment to sensing. From unhappiness to presence. From wondering if I’m meant to be with another lover to slowing way down and facing myself without resistance. Over and over. And here’s where you awaken the inner jewel of discovery that you are looking for.. the one you’ve been desperately hoping for.. and that your relationship really needs so that you can experience the delicious lovemaking and sexing that’s available to you.. that can be so amazing, that’s wonderful for the energy in your family.. and the world too.

And when you do this sensing, this deep moment to moment in your practice of becoming more present to yourself, you become more attuned to your body, and if your partner is, they do too. And this presence and space helps you connect better and more easily with each other, which produces much better sexual connection because you’re more connected within.

What’s ONE way this week you can slow down this week to make the sexual connections better? For me, I love slowing down my breath and sensing my body at the same time. It makes me far more present, vital and open.

Curious to hear what it may be for you.

And.. I’ve got ONE spot open this week for anyone who is wanting to turn up the hotness, love and intimacy in their love relationship…..even if you haven’t been having it for a while… get on this while there’s openings.. you can tell me any one thing you want help within your relationship.. and I’ll share with you the MOST EFFECTIVE thing that will totally help you.

We all want to be released from conflict, challenge and disconnection in our relationships.

But so often, we just don’t know what to do instead.

So if you’ve been feeling like there’s a rub in your relationship this week, a little something that’s bothering you, and you’re not sure what to do, PSSST… Check this out instead.

So often when there’s challenge, honestly, I see people really try to get rid of it.

They try to do everything to get away from it.

This includes fighting against it, addicting against it, distracting against it, flying away into some other world, or just hoping it magically goes away.

Endless Fights?

Bickering?

Power Struggles?

Too much phone, or Netflix or Podcasting… or addictions and distractions of any kind…

Checking out the new norm?

And the sad thing is, that none of these work, and nor will they EVER.

Fortunately after thousands of client hours, and several attempts to work with this myself I do know what works.

So I want you to try this.

Next time you have a conflict, do not try to get rid of it.

Don’t try to make it go away.

Guard against thoughts that would have you try to annihilate it or wish it wasn’t there.

And I want you to SHIFT YOUR FOCUS.

I want you to find one small place in your body that feels good.

If you can’t find a place that feels good or pleasurable, find a place where there is the absence of pain.

Got it?

Good.

When you get into that place in your body, find the sensation there.

Is that warm or cold?
Is it prickly or tingly?
Is it achy and dull?
Or is it sharp and bright?

Name the sensation.

Chances are that if it is a place of pleasure and or a place where there is no pain there’s going to be a good sensation there.

When you’ve got the sensation, I want you to breathe into, become aware of it, bring your presence to, bring your attention to, and focus on it.

I want you to keep doing this with every inhale and exhale.

And then I invite you to keep seeing what’s happening.

Ten times out of ten in my work with people, flow happens, disillusion of difficult states happens, more opportunities become available, more creativity opens up, more solutions come into consciousness.

And this is what you want.

The more you breathe with these sensations, the more that you are wiring into your nervous system the necessary resourcing and support that you actually need so that you can come back to the conflict and then it has a much better chance of being resolved.

Let me know ONE area this week you’re considering applying this to.

For me, I like working with a warmth in my heart, and I’m going to keep breathing that in and out through and through, after out through and through, and let it spread its yummy goodness all throughout my being.

Can’t wait to hear what you decide to do as well because I know it’s going to be excellent in helping you cultivate the hot sex love and closeness that you so deeply need and desire.

I want to tell you about my clients Mel and Mia.

They were parents in their late 30s with two daughters.

And when I first met them, there was something they felt was missing from their relationship. They described it as {and maybe you recognize your own relationship in them}
– a lack of vitality,
– a feeling of the juiciness not being there in the way they wished,

And it was really painful for them because they wanted so much to feel more integrated, to feel happier and to turn up the volume on their hot sex, love and closeness.

As I listened to them, not only with my mind, but with my heart and my full body, I became aware of a tightness in my central channel, (The area from my third eye all the way down the center of my body to my root).

I often sit with the different sensations in my body, and the feelings that come up when I sit with every client or couple.

No two are alike, and from my years of training and experience, I have learned to let what comes up in my field speak to me and inform me about what might be going on with the couple.

As I sat with this sensation and experienced, I noticed that there was a flatness in the couple.

And I was really curious about it.

Curiosity is one of the main awakened qualities that I believe ends the problem of knowing what the other person thinks or what you “know is going on” in your part of the dynamic.

So often what we think we know, isn’t really what’s going on at all but something entirely different.

And in this couple as I asked them what they would like to experience more of, I notice this experience in my central channel becoming more loose, and a little bit softened.

That told me that I was on the right path.

I listened in, and moved closer into really hearing them more deeply.

Mel started.

“I just feel like we’re not maximizing all the hard work we’ve been doing. It feels like it only goes so far and I wish there was more that we could do to increase the vitality in our life, our energy, to have more creativity and family and at work and in our community. We really need more creativity and more energy all across the board, but sometimes it’s just so overwhelming. “

I asked Mia a similar question and her response was very similar.

She said, “It only goes so far all of our efforts and I don’t understand why. But I do want it to go farther. But I feel like we’re stuck here.”

I then asked them from all of my years of working with trauma and attachment issues, what the feelings were like in their body.

And wouldn’t you know, the next thing they were sharing with me was exactly the same sensation that was in my central channel.

They described it to the ‘T’.

We began to work with it by really inquiring as to what those sensations were in the center.

Both of them were willing to look right within and see that those sensations seem to be able to only go so far and it mirrored what was happening in their life with some decent enough hot sex, love and closeness, but not enough in the way that they wanted to have a larger field of connection and relating, creating in their lives, and discovery.

So I guided them to be very present to the edges of those central channels.

And as we kept bringing presence to them, flow started to happen, the dissolution of the hard edge started to happen and movement started to happen.

This is really wonderful because they were doing it together and from my understanding of family systems combined with trauma work and nervous system understanding they began to co-create a healing and intimately connected nervous system that would guide their challenging spots into deeper flow and creation, which is exactly what they wanted.

We kept working with the edges of the heart and sensation, and it kept dissolving and moving into more flow.

Eventually, there were lots of wonderful physical movement happening in the session.

Arms were moving, bodies were moving, a little untraditional for what people think of when it comes to talk therapy or coaching.. but well, #thatsme

Sure I talk with people, but the real multi-dimensional change work definitely expresses itself in a different manifestation than probably anything like you’ve ever seen before because it’s what I know gets the biggest results, and is why so much of talk therapy only relationships fails.

Both Mel and Mia really desired to capitalize on the power of what connected sex, love and closeness brings, to work, to friendships, to family, to community, to healing, also to softening, repairing and ease together in connection.

We kept working with the hardened sensations right at the edge of where things had only gone so far.

And we all witnessed, with how the entire circle of their lives shifted, there was a huge blossoming that happened, opportunities opened, relationships became larger and more generous, their community was truly flowering in connection and deep care; all the things they had wanted, all by learning the power of generating the goodness of what was already there into more of what they deeply desired.

This is absolutely available for you as well.

If you’re reading this and going ‘wow I really want that, can I have that?’..or even if you’re reading this and feeling further gone than this couple you can STILL have it.

The answer is, yes you can have that, it’s your birthright to have it, you deserve to have it, and somewhere in there you really need to have it as well, there becomes a point where it is no longer negotiable.

And I know from having done this work so deeply inside my own self, with my husband, in our relationship, in all the places where it was so so challenging and so edgy, the other side is full of softness, closeness, vitality, a powerful field of co-care, co-connection, co-curiosity and co-discovery and ultimately a relationship that is better than I ever knew it could be.

This is what’s available to you, and it’s right here in the containers that I hold that I am inviting you to step into now.

So that you can have the hot sex, love and closeness that you desire, and not only that, but you can utilize it to generate even more powerful healing in all the places that need it all over your life.

That is worth its weight in gold.

What is ONE thing you’re going to do this week to start to create a bigger vision for the life you want?

I myself, am going to take some time on revisiting my vision of how I would like my life to be. And then I’m going to look at my relationship to see what can be generated from there, because I know how powerful it is, and I value the power of creativity and decision making to truly have what we desire.

Now it’s your turn.

Gosh, I wish I had this information 25 years ago.

At the time, I was in the middle of what turned out to be a ten year long relationship, and overwhelmed by more shadows than I could imagine.

I felt the need to have all of my issues together as I was pursuing this field, but in the depth of my heart and soul, I did not know at the time how deeply I was being initiated into the work that I now offer to you almost 30 years later.

My husband also, in his own life was being initiated through the relationships that he experienced as well, and both of us did not know how to do this one thing that I’m going to share with you that made true love grow bigger and provide truly soul satisfying hot sex, love and relationship fulfillment.

What was this?

We had to learn how to truly grab a hold of the starting place, or inception point, as I call it, of where activation of a potential danger happens, a perceived danger that can disconnect you, and what we had to learn to do instead, was to learn to nip it in the bud with the resources inside of us, that we grew, that would help us do that.

So what was it that actually helped us grab a hold of it?

How do you ride the tail of a wild dragon?

If you’re a big spirited person, colorful, vibrant, and have big energy which most of my clients have, it can be really challenging and you might really wonder if you’re with the wrong person, or wondering what else it’s going to take because no matter how many times you try, you just can’t seem to find a way to tame the dragon’s tail.

My husband will look at me with a funny look in his face, and he’d say to me, “Babe! I really don’t know how we’re gonna do this, you’re so set in your position here, and I’m set in my position over here. And we’re just not connecting. Let’s take another break.”

That was really hard, because we had to face what was overwhelming for us many times before we could fully develop the resources to hold it, and give it what it needs.

But we did.

And the most important thing was that we learned was to find a true way, a resourced way, to open up AND TRULY HANDLE to the big energies that got created between us.

If we were going to create big together, we also had the potential to create big problems together as well. I know I’m not the only one who experiences this.

And that was really hard to face, it was humbling, it brought up shame, and it also brought up a tremendous feeling of smallness because of the young places that were just too emotionally unintegrated at the time. For example, we both suffered with feeling not enough in places and also places where we just felt like we were too much. We both felt community with each other when we discovered that those places were pretty young, and instead of letting the negative cycle of struggle dominate us, we teamed up and found humanity and compassion and each other instead.

I’ll be honest with you, we just kept practicing, and practicing, and practicing, and there became a tipping point when those things that used to create a horrible rub between us, eventually became softer, and they became more filled with love, and no, it didn’t happen overnight, but it did happen.

And you know, that’s what grace really is, it’s meeting what’s there, not trying to make it different, not trying to put your spin on it, not the other person putting their spin on it, no struggle for dominance, no struggle for control, no struggle for competition, but simply, straightforwardly, with all of your love and presence absolutely meeting what is there without resistance or defense or any kind of hiding or avoidant behavior.

This is what creates grace.

We’ve heard the song, I once was lost, but now I’m found.

This is what happened to us, and this is what could happen for you if you can find the way to let everything that’s there actually truly be met for what it needs, in true presence, and in embodied awareness.

So for us, meeting those enoughness wounds with a presence we could actually feel IN our bodies, which literally changed everything, and made it so that the same old dramas could finally rest in the deep healing with the presence they had been calling out for all along. Sounds so much easier when said and much harder to actually do.

So if you need support or a mentor, get that, do that, it is so worth it for the gifts that it brings, the closeness and intimacy I now experience, the depth of love that is unlike any other love I have ever known, and the ability to create and drop into a beautiful sexual connection, at any time you wish, yes, even if you have children!

Honestly, these are deep and precious jewels. Let that sink in. And the value of that sink in too. What kind of different life can you create with these jewels securely nestled in your hearts together?

You can’t live your life without them unless you’ve decided on the monastic path, for whatever reason, and that’s fine, but that’s not most of you, so if you’re reading this and feeling a resonance, I just want you to know how critical these linchpin activation points are and how critical it is that whatever support is needed right in those places, it gets it,

– so that you both get it as well
– and that conflict gets it
– and the dynamic gets it
– and you feel held and present
– and you’re in grace because there’s no more fight
– and there’s no struggle because you’re in grace.

And it keeps working like that, and then miracles of things that before used to seem impossible will now start to happen and unfold and you’ll be amazed at what you can see.

There is love, closeness, connection and sex happening for me now that I never would have imagined three years ago, five years ago, ten years ago, I couldn’t even have pictured it.

But doing the work, that’s what makes it happen, that’s what makes it unfold.

So, isn’t it your time to have this?

Let me know if you feel comfortable, ONE thing you’re going to do this week to just to start to create more love and grace in your relationship?

I hate wasting anyone’s time, and you always know me that I’ll get straight to the point and make what I share with you straight to the heart, practical, and actually shift the needle on what’s important to you when it comes to turning up the dial on Hot Sex, Love and Closeness.

And the ones who take the big risks, are the ones who reap the greatest rewards.

And so.. if you’re having sex or love making this week…and you’re noticing.. meh.. it could be more.. more pleasurable, more fulfilling, more satisfying.. I DARE you to make this move and just watch what happens.

What I’m talking about is the power of a WITNESS.

You see, 100% of my couples or individual clients who struggle with this, feel alone. The obstacles are alone. The vulnerabilities are alone. The pain is left all alone.

Even from their partners.

And from themselves.

But when you turn towards your partner…and yourself,

And are truly transparent about the obstacle
And truly vulnerable
And truly undefended
And name it

HUGE SHIFTs happen!

It the power of a witness
– who sees you
– who loves you
– who supports you
– who has your back
– who wants your pleasure to be fully alive
– who wants you to be fulfilled

And who you feel safe with..

will help establish connection, support and a sense of BEING WITH you, right in this place…

This is what creates huge shifts. I saw this at least five times this week.

And sometimes the witness to someone sharing their biggest obstacles was the partner, sometimes it was me witnessing and guiding the partner to share the obstacle..Sometimes it was the person, acknowledging themselves in the embrace of my deep and loving presence and sensitive, attuned container. No matter which configuration, people were seen, inner parts were seen, difficult things got seen. Aloneness and loneliness got reduced. And this resulted in reduced reactivity, clearing, healing and more flow inside of them and in their relationships.

All ways.. the result was GOLDEN.

I mean, you could stay stuck here beloveds, or you could truly let the support in.. and believe me, I know it’s not easy.. but you can do it.. you must…

And you will, because you are meant for glorious, holy, OMG sex…

You get to have it.. yes, you do.. if you DARE..

So tell me.. or even, better, tell you.. what’s ONE way, you’re going to set yourself up for success this week, so you can be witnessed. For me, I feel the need to have a good cry to release some old pain I’ve been carrying around this.. and share with my beloved all about it. I know that will feel good.

How about you.

If you want to grow your sexual pleasure, you have to work through your limits.
 
And if you want to work through your limits, you have to be willing, open and courageous.
 
So here’s the thing if you’re ready.
 
Next time you’re having sex…love making.. or self pleasuring…
 
Find that place in your body where your upper limit of pleasure is… where you want more.. but more is not happening..
 
Locate it in your body, when you reach the hesitation, the limit, the anxiety of what’s next.
 
And then identify the sensation.
 
Speak it out loud.
 
Is it a hot ache in your chest.. a tingling in your heart…etc.
 
So often we skip by this and try to think our way out of it.
 
In this area, it’s futile mostly.
 
We fight about it.
 
We fly away or numb out with Netflix or other screen distractions.
 
But I’m telling you if you don’t get to that sensation, it will create more limitation, drama and disconnection..
 
Enough of that.
 
And once you identify that sensation…NAME it out loud to your beloved.
 
Own it.
 
For example, for me, I once shared this with my hubby. “Babe, I want to open up more to you.. but when I feel that desire, my chest gets tight. And it aches.. And I want to be honest with you about it.” Instead of complaint.. or withdrawing which is what we can do, I was present with it, and he was present with me.. and then he could support me and giving me what I needed, which ended up being his super warm, loving hand.. on my chest.. sending love energy right into the sensation. God!! That felt amazing.
 
Cause when you name it, you’re creating a presence filled container for it to be actually be held in, instead of shoving it down by cruising past it, letting it continue to create the same trouble for you both.
 
And when you keep doing this….it;

• softens
• relaxes
• flows
• and frees you up to be more PRESENT

to create the epic, soulful sex, waiting to surge out of your soul.. your hearts, your bodies..  

What’s ONE thing you’re willing to do to create the SPACE this week to connect with this practice? I’m setting aside a time in my meditation each am to attend to this.. and get more and more explicitly clear on what’s going on IN my body, what sensations I have, what they are called, and naming them to my hubby eventually, and I know if I do this, then the floodgates of connection, closeness and sex open, because that’s what’s happens..
 
So trust me.. do the work.. and let’s rise up in this together.
 
I got ya.

I KNOW you don’t want to miss this… it’s seriously some of my most epic teachings ever on a subject that most don’t want to talk about or touch with a ten foot pole, but for me, those are what excite me the most and get me lit up to share with you for your benefit and healing, so you can truly get going on having all the Hot Sex, Love and Closeness you need, and desire.

And yesterday’s Livestream was everything you’re going to want to know about how to get all the epic sex you want, even if you’ve lost hope, or are wondering what’s going to make any difference, especially if you feel stuck or at an impasse.

I’ve got you covered. Because I’ve been there. And gotten myself, my partner, and so many clients through it.

The BIGGEST complaint I get from clients (and that I used to have) is that the sex isn’t fulfilling their needs in exactly the way they desire.

The complaining and criticism.
The dissatisfaction.
The wondering if they’re with the right person.
The confusion as to what to do.
The overwhelm with the complexity of getting to the bottom of it.

Wondering what to do? Or how to navigate this?

Believe me people, I’m not ashamed to admit this was me. Every box. And then some.

There was so much I didn’t know. I felt so vulnerable I didn’t know what to do or who to turn to.

And then one day, I was fortunate to receive the exact healing work that helped me resolve ALL these problems.. and learn how to have truly amazing, epic, hot sex!

It wasn’t easy. And I sometimes doubted myself and that we’d make it through to the other side.

I studied and practiced and made mistakes and learned and mastered the fine art of delicately and sensitively cultivating this for myself and thousands of individuals and couples.

And because I want to get this healing IN your hands, easily and efficiently. It’s all right here.

I want to invite you to learn WHAT to do if you’re;

– at your limit in your sex life but want to go farther
– feeling frustrated because it seems like others are having amazing experiences and you’re wondering what you did wrong
– feeling unfulfilled sexually..and know there’s more for you
– wanting to cross some new thresholds sexually and you’re not sure what to do
– feeling in a sexual rut or like you’ve lost your spark

Come and get this information from an industry expert who has DEVOTED their life to understanding how to break through this and helping thousands do so…

I’m going to break it down for you, and share with you exactly what to do and you’re gonna love it.. and then probably exhale a deep sigh.

Most of us are affected by Hollywood and all the damn pics on Facebook and Instagram showing success and carefree-ness in love, work, and sex.

I’m calling BS.

It’s so often very different on the backend.

Let me take you inside.

Most of my clients are entrepreneurs, coaches and people who run start ups.

And when they feel safe with me, which they do, because I create a very powerful space for people to drop down into and in, the vulnerabilities emerge. On love, intimacy, parenting.. and especially SEX.

Everyone wants some form of improvement.

Everyone has limits.

Somewhere.

And to get the ball rolling, and help you make it easier to have this.. I’m here to nudge you this week.. to start.. by sharing with your person..

ONE thing that you feel sexual vulnerability about…

Just in the last week I witnessed men and women share

• vulnerability that they weren’t attractive to their partners after pregnancy
• vulnerability that they didn’t have a huge penis
• vulnerability that they couldn’t have sex all night
• vulnerability that their orgasms weren’t what or the way they thought the other person wanted
• vulnerability that they weren’t as powerful as they wanted to be

And I’ve got to tell you.. the release it brought.. from just naming it…

the flow

the conversation

the ease

the connection!!

this does not have to be hard, and fought with confusing thoughts about what to do or say or be! But if you want a better sexual connection you do have to move in the direction of deciding to be in flow, in conversation, and pursuing the very things that give you ease….

So now, it’s your turn.

Make the space.

Make the time.

Get together.

And go.

And to keep you on it.. just for yourself or you can share it here.. What’s ONE move you’ll make with your partner this week to create the time to do this? I’m scheduling time with my beloved for tomorrow morning.. and it’s on the calendar.. and for me, if it’s in my calendar.. it WILL happen..

Can’t wait to see what you discover..

When you resolve troublesome body sensations, like the ache in your chest that can come up when you imagine going deeper, hotter, wilder.. or the sharp pain that comes up in your stomach.. when you imagine opening up even more.. or maybe there’s a pressure behind your eyes when you fantasize about going even deeper…. there’s no stopping how far your sex life and for that matter, the rest of your life can progress.

Let me share a story with you that will touch your soul, and whet your appetite with energy and focus toward experiencing the full liberation of your own sexual desires.

My client Joan and Neal deeply struggled with maintaining great sexual connection. They had two kids, age 6 and 9. and were both entrepreneurs with their own businesses.

I sometimes watch clients eyes when they come in the room, not to stare at them but sometimes in a moment because I can see so deeply a person’s true nature, that I can also see all the barriers in the form of conditioning, and messaging they received that cover that beauty and love up.

Joan was beautiful. Huge brown eyes, elegant, vivacious, and salt of the earth kind of woman Neal fell in love with. His eyes filled with love when he started to talk about them falling in love, and all the epic, non stop love-making they experienced that was ecstatic, fulfilling and everything he said a man could want.

But over time, as romantic love wore off, and power struggles began, so did their colliding history of sexual imprints (templates inside of us handed down from our lineages) rise up to be resolved.

They kept coming up against barriers to opening to and receiving deeper and deeper pleasure, love and connection. It went from bad to worse. They bickered, blamed, fought and moved into separate bedrooms. They hurt, individually and then they hurt each other. And it made them question like many of my clients before them?

• What are we doing wrong?
• Is it me?
• Is it them?
• (and the ever dreaded) maybe we’re not compatible?

But because I am trained in not only Emotionally Focused Therapy for Couples, but also deep Trauma work as well, and Teacher Trained to help couples restore erotic friction.. I knew that I had the resources to help them resolve this issue, in exactly the way they needed it.

You see, not every couple needs the same intervention, nor at the same time. Sometimes a piece of the emotion between them comes up to be re-processed using the masterful work of Emotionally Focused Therapy which creates and restores secure emotional attachment between couples.

And other times, it is a battle of minds, fixed opinions, stories, ideas or projections of the other that require attention.. and I give that care to dissolve those patterns of mind, and return them to free, and creative will, based on the 25 year solid practice experience of Buddhism which teaches us that the true nature of our minds is empty of anything real and only exist to the extent that we put something in them to project out. When couples feel safe to slow down, and choose what goes in the mind, which is simply a projector, they always make a different movie, one where they want to see a happy ending in.

And in this couple, after more assessment, struggled with painful body sensation that came up for WANTING more desire. Their desires were not bad, but because they were raised in strong and traditional Catholic families and were led imprinted to feel shame, the pleasure was okay to a certain extent, but wild, rapturous pleasure was bad, sinful.

And there was a whole inside network, compiled of sensations, buried on top of one another that were trapped in a big ball in both of their nervous systems, in their bodies.

And untangling these sensations, one by one, in both of them, with deep presence, and turning towards them instead of fighting about them, or numbing out with Netflix, or flying away to something else, those sensations were finally MET, and they started to dissolve, and free up, and the network of limitation and stuckage loosened, and got freer and freer, so free will of creating the pleasure filled sex life they knew they were capable of and so deeply desired, WAS BORN.

BOOM! It happens like that.

And this is what it takes; to create the Hot Sex you deeply need and deserve people.

And the truth is you can’t do it alone, or have your friends give you a few words of advice here…this is work for a trained and seasoned expert, not just talk, but actually going through these things to free up difficult sensations so that full pleasure, which is your absolute birthright, can have the full landscape of your body, heart and soul to flow FREELY….and ecstatically as well.

Just imagine yourself having that. The freedom. The ease. Expert guidance, Imagine all the hot sex and love that are truly meant to be yours… waiting for you to decide, and to do the work to claim it.

So tell me, this week, what’s ONE step you can take to get going in the direction of freeing up your body so you too can have all the Hot, delicious and wild sex you are destined for?