I’ve been saying all week, the number one complaint I hear from couples is one of disconnection. Some of the things I hear are;
I’m just not feeling connected as I want to be,
What’s the problem, is it mine or his?
What can I do to feel more connected?
Maybe I shouldn’t be in this relationship or, I should be in another one where I can get my connection needs met there…
None of these are the answers to what you are seeking. The key and challenge here is to make a practice out of restoring connection in the moment first with yourself.
Intimacy with yourself is absolutely key and I know we can all be challenged with it so I’m volunteering to show you with myself that when I struggle with connection with myself or my partner I do this;
I imagine a time or recall a time and/or ask my beloved to remind me of a time when we were truly connected, and we describe it, we describe where we were, what it looked like, what it felt like, and how it was for us.
Once you are feeling the connection, both of you, identify the sensations; do you feel tingling in your arms, where is that in your body, is it prickly, is it warm, is a cold?
And pretty soon, what happens is that we start to feel connected, we’re literally recreating the connection energy between us just by conjuring it up from previous times where it was authentic and true.
I want you to practice this and see what can happen for you.
And then once you’ve identified the sensations simply be present to them.
Breathe them in, breathe them out, and repeat.
I’d love to hear what happens for you. And I’d love to hear ONE step this week that you’re going to take so that you can make this practice happen. Remember, practice does not make perfection, as we’ve been taught, it makes for connection and we’ve been fed a mass of lie that we should know how to do sex and intimacy and connection super easy, but it’s B.S.
I can’t wait to hear what happens for you.
