Name One Negative Family Pattern To Your Partner And Do THIS To Shift It.

My husband and I used to bicker sometimes.

And then lo and behold, the kids had their own version of it one day.

It wasn’t fun. And we shouldn’t have been surprised.

And we knew we had to shift it and this is how we did it.

And how you can too.

Ready?

Next time you’re with your partner, name the ONE thing that you don’t like about your kids. (It’s okay to admit. Everyone has something…)

Got it?

Good.. Okay.. and now…

I want you both to name how that pattern lives in the two of you.

How it speaks.
How it feels.
How it acts.
How it gets addressed by the two of you.. or doesn’t.
How it gets what it actually needs by the two of you, or doesn’t.

And notice how that feels.. just to get that out.

And then…I want you to ask..

what it needs.
what it wants.
what it is asking for to get healed or addressed so it can STOP.
and what commitments it needs from you to cease.

And then, really simply… I want you to DO it.

And then see what happens.

This doesn’t have to be hard if you’re willing to take a risk to do it.. and give it the help it needs..

For us, when we bickered, we would get inside of the apparent argument, and then ask ourselves what was underneath it.. what it really wanted, what it desired. And we listened. And what we saw was that it was competition for control. That was relieving. And then we could be creative. And then we gave it the exact things it needed. And then, it really shifted.

What’s one thing about the kids that’s driving you crazy right now? Giving each other permission around this is the key! I’ll go first and share mine in the comments.

LMK in the comments..

I got ya on this one.. and I KNOW this will help because I’ve done it myself.. and so have thousands of my clients over the years, with huge a-has, breakthroughs…

And, it ALWAYS helps turn up the Hot Sex, Love and Closeness dial…