Look, love can be complicated.
If you think about it enough.
If you allow yourself to get your head ahead of directly experiencing what’s in your heart, and slowing down enough to feel into what your love is actually saying.
It’s sad, but millions of people overlook this every day, and decisions to dissolve marriages and partnerships get based on not having this essential intimacy…
That is…the intimacy of being IN relationship.. in conversation with LOVE itself.
Like my clients James and John, who I swear blew me away with HOW they applied the undeniable love-healing gems that became unearthed when we worked together.
When I met them, they were in FULL ON busy parent, huge job mode, enormous stress mode, and triggered into disconnection left, right and center.
I could see they loved each other, but there was a layer of confusion over their eyes, sadness, and hurt.
They were teetering thin on vapors of the romantic love they’d experienced when they first got together…bickering…and out of touch with each other.
And maybe you’re like them, so super sharp and quick witted, that it’s easy to get away from the center of what brought love and amplified connection and more erotic sexual experiences.
I know from being a smart person myself, how much I needed to make things simpler in love and not overthink things, to not analyze, not be only – mind intelligent, but also emotionally intelligent, and to frankly learn to drop down, through my senses into the healing nectar of the heart.
And to have access to the very inside of what’s true, so I can get to the essence of what’s real and then grow it from there.. smart, emotional and generative.
Like I was at one point, James and John were a shred away from splitting up.
“He’s always on his phone.
He won’t prioritize us.
He’s not telling me how he feels.
He’s shutting down from me.
He’s avoiding dealing with challenges.
He’s not cuddly anymore.
He’s right…I’m not cuddly anymore.”
I almost started crying it was so painful.
Of course, that tells me how they felt.. but couldn’t access.
But I needed to help them access it or else they were going to blow apart pretty quickly.
So I helped them get grounded,
anchored into their center,
breath in their bodies,
and asked them a simple set of questions.
‘What would love say about this?
What would love do about this?
How would love act?’
This stopped them dead in their tracks.
Because they couldn’t think, literally!
Tears started to well up.
They felt the shift from mind to heart, not just as an idea. It was a physical experience.
Whereas before, they were ‘talking about’ wanting to feel cuddly, when they truly dropped into the questions, their hearts felt the missing of the cuddly, and the tears came from that. They could feel it.
And I saw their intelligent minds kick in, but this time with love and heart at the center.
Amazing what a difference that makes.
Or at least their minds were no longer in charge.
They were smart, but INSIDE their love was way smarter.
And getting inside the voice of love, the energy of love and being willing to go through the inquiry was essential.
Intimacy with love 1.
Another family needlessly split up 0.
Victory.
The intimacy with love itself became louder, wilder and undeniable.
Another disconnection turned around.
Another family stayed together in goodness, health and ever expanding closeness.
Another couples restored in love.
Now honestly, why would anyone need to suffer when these capacities are resources are available to you, like this, right now?
Tell me ONE thing you can do right now, to get inside the love questions this week? A fun thing I’m gonna do is ask myself this question right before bed each night, and first thing in the am.. and then see what comes from it.
Can’t wait to hear what you find.
